A commonly misunderstood area of Western psychedelic history involves psychoactive ointments that have become part of popular lore during the early modern and Renaissance eras. These substances amorphously considered as “flying ointments” have various histories. This paper addresses four separate histories regarding these beliefs: (a) one conveyed in the writings of anthropologist Michael Harner in his Hallucinogens and Shamanism (Harner, 1973); (b) an early modern reconceptualization of witches’ ointments history that began 600 years ago as a theological misconstrual of the nature of these magical unguents that fueled popular ideas about witches; (c) a probable historical reality of transvection ointments (referring to their alleged ability to make the person fly in some form) containing powerful tropane alkaloids (henbane, mandrake, and belladonna) that informed other traditions; and (d) a “post modern ointment” derived by contemporary scholars who doubted the reality of any actual flying ointments, instead ascribing them to literary traditions and the product of overworked and fearful religious minds. This article presents the evidence for these varying conceptions that early modern “flying ointments” have taken throughout the centuries and relates them to the broader cultural trends that have shaped these ointments in popular imagination. Careful adjudication of primary and secondary sources suggests that only the transvection ointment had an actual basis in historical fact.